A few Saturdays ago I had the pleasure of spending the afternoon with a group of wonderful ladies.  It was a spray tan party- we all gathered to have our bodies misted with bottled bronzer in hopes of achieving that sun-kissed look (unfortunately my bronze was heavy on the orange, but that’s another story!).

I’ve known some of these women for quite some time, others only briefly and a few were new introductions. All equally beautiful, strong ladies.

As we waited for the “tan lady” to call each of us in individually, we all sat enjoying the days beautiful weather, chattering and laughing as we girls do.

Each of us had different ideas on “how bare” we would be while the tanning technician sprayed us down.  A few were ready to strip down to the undies, a few already donned their swimsuits under the “loose clothing” we were earlier instructed to wear (myself the latter).

But as we sat, jittery with anticipation of leaving our gathering with our new tropical bronzed glows, I noticed a pretty obvious constant amongst many of us.

There was tension and (for lack of a better word) anxiety in the air. Yes. Anxiety.  Not worry about the actual outcome of the tan itself- although we did joke about looking the dreaded orange streaks- but mostly the worry about exposing body parts to our technician. Pieces of ourselves that many of us were “less than confident” with.

The worry was obvious as the conversation went and included the typical lady-laugh along with it. You know, the one where we are clearly scared-as-hell….but we nervously giggle to try to mask our concerns.

The previous post was about self-love. And that lovely Saturday afternoon clearly illustrated how little many of us understand its importance- the magnitude of freedom and empowerment that self-embracing will present if we accept it.

So this series has sort of become my baby… Presenting Sex Toys & Sensual products at the Goodies Girl parties here in Vegas are always so much fun.  But more than the laughs and fabulous times we have at the parties, I really do want the ladies (and men as well!) to walk away with more knowledge and a heightened sense of self-confidence.  To understand how liberating it is to understand, and most importantly,  love you and your body.  When I decided to start this ongoing feature I knew I wanted to present as many women as I could with ideas that would help them feel as beautiful as each one is.

52 Weeks to Becoming the Sexiest You!   Week 3

Ladies, we have to stop beating ourselves up.  It does zero good…

If a group of women sat down and were asked to write a list of things that they loved about themselves, and then asked to write another about what they disliked about themselves, which list do you think would be the longest.

I’d probably be safe to say that 9 out of 10 times the dislike list would be far longer- possibly even 10 out of 10. That’s sad- and certainly not sexy….

HERE is the post about “Loving Yourself”.  This was about finding ways to love you.  Inside.  And my opinion is you gotta tackle and love the inside- first and foremost…


Yes, YOU silly!  We’ve worked on LOVING OURSELVES on the INSIDE.  Now it’s time to tackle the outside.

What? You hate you (insert body part/ feature here).  And you (insert that other thing here).   And….  Geesh! QUIT IT!

We can sometimes (eh, most of the time….) be our own worst enemy.  Time to loose that hate baggage.  Yeah, I know- we were trained to believe that vanity is unbecoming of a lady.  GET OVER IT!   You ARE allowed to love things about you!


In order to be the sexy you wanna be,

 you’ve got to know what makes you glow. Stand in that mirror girl- stand there, gasp!, NAKED.  Now just look.  Graze your body from head to toe with your eyes. 

 Turn around- look back and do the same.  STOP EWWW-ing!   Stop focusing on “that” part!  THERE!  Did you catch it?  The thing that you love!  Is it your shoulders?  Eyes?  Ohhhh those perfectly straight tootsies (now I’m jealous!), look at that ever-so-sexy small of your back!  Lookie there- you’ve got some great features, don’t you!!!  YES you do!

It’s just a matter of stopping to smell the roses.  So much time spent on negatives.  Time to embrace the positives!  Not an easy task for most, and that stinkin’  mirror may make you want to gag the first few gazes…. But- you CAN find something you love, hoping even MANY THINGS that you love about YOU!


Whew! Now that the self-reflections are done it’s time to work it.  Take those features you dig and play ’em up!  Sexy shoulders deserve to be shown off….Killer pucker? Douse those luscious lips with your favorite color and gloss!

  Love your thighs?  Slip into a skirt or shorts that show the world how sexy you are!

Make it a point to play up all those little positives you’ve been neglecting for so long!  Stop focusing on the (usually self-inflicted) “don’t likes” & put all of those “I loves” on display!  Walk tall- shoulders back ladies…head high!

Because you, Dahhhhling, are SIMPLY FABULOUS!